A Golfer and a Girl

It's Memorial Day, Not the Third Day of Your Weekend of Chores

2010-05-31T01:39:00.006-04:00

Memorial Day.

The unofficial start of summer.

The reason we get a three-day weekend.

An excuse to barbecue, get together with friends and family, get caught up on all those little projects.

OR

Memorial Day.

A day to remember our fallen soldiers, and to honor their sacrifice.

My family has been lucky. Every generation has served in the military, and our losses in battle have been few. I have recently been researching my family history, and have learned that my family connection to this country goes back to the French and Indian War, when a young man named Alexander Waddell traveled from Scotland as a kind of "soldier of fortune" for the British. This man was my Great-Great-Great-Great-Great-Great Grandfather.

He stayed, and subsequently served in both the first and last battles of the Revolutionary War. While at Yorktown, he stumbled across his younger brother, Matthew, who was serving on the British side. Alexander had last seen Matthew in Scotland,when he left his entire life behind. Expecting to never see his family again, Alexander rejoiced in finding his brother. Imagine, on a battlefield of thousands, finding a familiar and familial face. What a miracle that they both survived and reconnected.

Knowing that my roots go that far back, knowing that my grandfather so many generations back came here and embraced the idea of America, that he was willing to fight and give his life for a fledgling country that was willing to adopt him as one of their own, makes me so much prouder to be who I am and where I'm from.

So today, as you're going about your holiday...remember why the holiday exists. For every soldier that fought and lived, so many others fought and died. And that is why we have today off.

To remember our fallen.

To give thanks that they offered themselves to further the cause.

To ensure that their sacrifices, no matter how long ago, are never forgotten.

This is one of my favorite poems. Its imagery is haunting and timeless.

In Flanders Fields
By: Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae, MD (1872-1918)
Canadian Army

In Flanders Fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

A woman named Moina Michael added her own verse to the poem, which I think speaks even more to this day.

We cherish too, the Poppy red
That grows on fields where valor led,
It seems to signal to the skies
That blood of heroes never dies.

This Is All I've Got

2010-03-03T14:33:00.003-05:00

That Can't Be Right

2010-02-28T15:20:00.003-05:00

Hey, quick question...

I know I'm a bit behind on television shows, particularly reality shows, and especially ones on MTV, but I'm wondering...this Snooki idiot? Does she know she's orange? Orange isn't really a flesh tone for healthy people.

Has someone checked into this?

Wife of the Year

2010-02-28T11:41:00.003-05:00

Why am I wife of the year? Well, I woke up at 5am. On a Sunday. So I could drive Dave to the college in order for him to pick up the team van so he could depart with his golf team for their annual spring break trip to North Carolina.

Road to Hiram, 5:30am...not in my bed. Sad.

Yeah, there was no carrot at the end of that stick for me. They drove south and I went home where I tried in vain to go back to bed. No luck. Instead, I got busy doing laundry and cleaning. To be honest, they probably aren't going to be getting great weather in Pinehurst either, so I'm not terribly jealous.

Well, since it's been such a long time from the last true update, let's recap the last several months.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Merry Christmas!!

Happy New Year!!!

Smooches for Valentine's Day, also.

And here we are, searching the skies and lawns desperately for a sign of spring. It's hard to check for spring flowers under 18 inches of snow, but I'm intrepid like that.

Dave and I are still splitting the week, with me in Columbus Monday through Friday, then home on the weekend. We are hopeful about some kind of job for him anywhere in Central Ohio, but it's really getting hard. I have to be honest for a minute, though, and tell you how much fun we have together on weekends. It's like we've figured out how to do it, how to make it work and we focus on the 40-some hours we get instead of the 120-some hours we don't.

We'll get there, right? Same zip code would be nice, but at this point, I would take same area code!

Going Global

2010-01-31T14:18:00.003-05:00

So, I finally update my blog for the first time in almost three months, and I get visitors from six of the seven continents in the past 24 hours. Quite frankly, Antarctica really doesn't count.

Can we talk for just a minute about how totally jealous I am right now of Amalah? She and her family are currently sunning themselves on a fabulous beach in Jamaica, courtesy of a gracious owner of some gorgeous villas. I bear no ill-will to her at all...I would have totally taken them up on the offer. They paid their own airfare, but the accommodations were free. She gets to talk about it on her blog, and she has been totally upfront about all of it. But considering how freaking cold it is right now, and how much longer we'll be putting up with winter, I am craving sun, sand and warmth!

Not to mention the fact that Dave and I have never been able to take a honeymoon due to scheduling, then financial, then scheduling reasons. And the fact that I see him for less than 48 hours a week. And that place looks pretty romantic. I want a trip, too!

Yeah, yeah, don't we all.

Speaking of romance, today is the sixth anniversary of my first date with the golfer! Our date consisted of a women's college basketball game, dinner, then a men's college basketball game. Quite the date. I was smitten, needless to say.

For the past five anniversaries, we were able to go back to the same restaurant to celebrate. We aren't able to do that this time, but we are celebrating anyway.

Have a wonderful week!

Let's Catch Up, Shall We?

2010-01-30T21:23:00.003-05:00

Previously, on A Golfer and a Girl...

Dear NBC,

Hi. The Great Jay Leno 10pm Experiment? Not working. Let's just chalk it up to a bad idea and a lack of leadership to veto it.

Yeah, so, you're welcome! But not you, Conan! Hey, I had no way of knowing it was going to go down this way.

Brown Paper Packages Tied Up With String

2009-11-07T16:26:00.004-05:00

Dave and I have been together for almost 6 years. This season will be our fifth Christmas together. Five holidays of gift-giving. Five seasons of trying to find the perfect gift for parents, siblings, nieces, nephews and the occasional cousin. Five. This year is is the first time I have gone shopping with Dave. Usually I do it all myself. It wasn't terrible. For me, at least. I think it was terrible for Dave when I kept asking him questions about what women would love to get. But hey, if you're going to be tagging along, you have to play the part.

So yes, we have started the Christmas shopping. I was amazed to find out that most people start shopping after Thanksgiving. Amazed! That seems like so much work to cram in such a short period of time. I started in August. I have a lot of people on my Christmas list.

I have found as I've gotten older that Christmas has flipped for me. I used to be so excited to get presents. And, don't get me wrong, I still do! But now I find the true excitement lies in hunting for the perfect present, wrapping it in adorable paper, tying the ribbon, and then watching in anxious anticipation for it to be opened. And then hoping they love it, love it, LOVE IT...otherwise, I am ashamed to admit, my feelings are hurt. I know it's silly, but I want to find the perfect gift for everybody on my list.

Is anybody else like this?

More Letters I Would Love to Send

2009-11-07T00:09:00.005-05:00

Dear NBC,

Hi. The Great Jay Leno 10pm Experiment? Not working. Let's just chalk it up to a bad idea and a lack of leadership to veto it.

Dear Pandora,

Really? Petra? Really?!? On my Keane channel? Can I assume it was a computer glitch that won't happen again? Thanks. Also, Christian Music from 1989 called...they need their synthesizers back.

Petra...are you freaking kidding me?

Dear Jon Gosselin and Hailey Glassman,

Yeah, I'm not sure if you know this already, but going on Entertainment Tonight isn't considered a couples therapy session. What, exactly, were you thinking?!? Mary Hart doesn't moonlight as mental health professional. Stop it, please. It's awkward, this train wreck masquerading as your "relationship."

Dear Jim Carrey,

Could you please stop ruining Christmas movies for me? First the Grinch and now A Christmas Carol? That's quite enough.

And speaking of Christmas, one last timely letter...

Dear Santa,

I have been a very good girl this year, so I am asking for a trip to Tahiti. Thank you!

Letters I Would Love To Send

2009-10-30T23:59:00.002-04:00

Dear Lady in the Seat to my Left,

Here's the thing...my husband and I came early. We knew what time the movie started and we planned accordingly. That is so we could pick out our seats. You and your husband were late. You chose to shoehorn yourselves into our row, taking the last two seats right as the movie started, even though there were other seats you could have had. I didn't say anything when your husband kept talking to you; I knew he would shut up eventually. And he did. Eventually. But here's the thing...when you get there late, you lose your right to the armrest. I was early. I claimed it. Did you really think I was going to give it up? Please! Next time, show up early.

Dear Every Other Driver on I-71,

It's called the fast lane for a reason. You camping out in it going ten miles less than the other lanes isn't really helping anyone. It doesn't matter that you're going the exact speed limit. Did you miss the signs telling slower traffic to get into the right lane? Guess what? If you're in the left lane and traffic in the other lanes is passing you, you are the slower traffic to which the sign refers.

Dear Ohio Turnpike,

Thanks for catching up to the late 1990s and finally using E-ZPass. You rock.

Dear Raising Canes,

Your sauce is crazy delicious. SO freaking yummy! But what the heck is up with your entrances to the drive-thru? It's like navigating a maze in a car. I feel like you're applying an IQ test before people can eat at your establishment. I'm not saying that's a deal-breaker.

Dear Adam from Man Vs Food,

I'm worried about you. Seriously. You need your agent to renegotiate your contract to include cholesterol testing, appropriate meds as prescribed and the occasional stress test. Hey, you're fun to watch, but there is no way you can get approved for life insurance. You need to think about the future.

Dear Any Bus Driver Who Gets the Chance,

Please run over Heidi and Spencer. Back up. Run them over again. Please feel free to repeat as you deem necessary. Thanks from a grateful nation.

Prayers Needed for Another Blogger

2009-10-04T01:23:00.002-04:00

Please head over to Jen Murray's blog, 4tunate, and give her some support. If you aren't familiar with Jen or her blog, she is the mom of 2 1/2 yr old quadruplet boys, who are just as gorgeous as can be.

Her husband, Brad, was laid off from his position this past week, and they can use prayers and positive thoughts.

It's a bad time for a lot of people...Dave and I are so blessed that we are both gainfully employed and relatively safe in our positions. Having been through job loss for several months last year, I know how scary and frustrating it can be. Even though we are apart quite a bit, things could be so much worse.

Jen, I am praying for you, Brad and the boys. God bless!

2009-10-04T00:33:00.002-04:00

My husband told me tonight that he has never read Where the Wild Things Are. I told him he needs to march back to his elementary school and demand a refund. It saddens me that the books I hold dearest in my heart are things he knows nothing about. What's worse...he called it queer. Should I punch him in the face now or later?

Obviously I'm not really going to punch him in the face. Especially since he just told me he did read The Monster At The End Of This Book, which is one of my favorites. He redeemed himself.

Apparently my husband doesn't have much of an imagination...or much use for it. Forty is so unbecoming to him.

I wonder if he will get over that if we have kids. Maybe. But I finally understand why he says things like "Stop reading so many books and watch some television." He's obviously not a reader.

Recap, Except Not Really

2009-09-27T19:57:00.000-04:00

So, I've been a little neglectful of this blog. Like almost two months neglectful. Here's a really quick recap...had my birthday, didn't see Dave for a month due to poor scheduling, my mom got married, and I made the cake.

All caught up!

The truth is that I was feeling a bit blocked. I couldn't think of what to write about. So I wrote nothing. But I've missed it, so I'm back.

Tonight's installment is coming to you from the parking lot of a Cracker Barrel, due to a flat tire. What better time to blog than during the wait for AAA? It always seems like something needs fixed or adjusted on our vehicles. Today's winner is the Explorer. What does it win? Apparently two new tires.

Nice.

Attention, Please!

2009-08-05T10:35:00.002-04:00

Today,

August 5th,

is

my

BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!

Yay me!!!!

Thank you very much. You may now return to your regularly scheduled activities.

Dragging You All With Me Down Memory Lane

2009-08-03T17:43:00.003-04:00

I finally found the pictures of my Great-Gramma that I wanted to show you! I wrote about her in April. Here she is with me, when I was just a sweet little thing. Oh, how times have changed!

Here she is with all of her great-grandkids at the time. Those are my older brothers, Bryan and Brad. Brad is on the right and looks like he is ready to make a break for it. I'm trying to figure out why Bryan has a pink belt on his pants. I mean, yeah, it was the 70's, but still. And then she is holding my cousin Clint and me. I am 9 days older than Clint.

Doesn't she look so kind and gentle and great-grandmotherly. Looking at these pictures makes me miss her so much, even though she passed when I was very young. But I have such fond memories of her. She always wore brooches. And apparently liked to wear outfits that were fuchsia pink.

Oh, looky! Here I am with my mom at Christmas...boy, I sure do look happy. Filled with the Christmas spirit, am I! This look of mutiny can be found on my niece's face. Apparently Palmer does take a bit after our side of the family.

This is one of the few pictures ever taken of Clint and me as babies where he isn't running me over.

This picture cracks me up!! What a cheesy grin! I'm totally making this my Facebook profile pic. I remember this wallpaper in Gramma Alice's house in New Albany.

Hey, gloves still fit me like this!

And, sometimes my hair still looks like this. Nice to know some things never change.

So, I Started This Little Project, and Now It's a Business!

2009-08-03T17:27:00.004-04:00

OMG! I have totally lost my ever-loving mind.

Back in April, I started taking cake-decorating classes because I thought it would be fun. And, you know, a great way to meet other people. And, um, also, I was going to bed every night at 9pm which was driving my husband crazy. Apparently living with Gramma makes you inherit certain traits. Dinner at 5:30pm. Making my bed...every day! Assigned days for cleaning. So I thought I needed to get out for a bit.

Anyway, long story short...I started telling people about the classes, and how I was loving every minute of it. And that I also discovered I had a knack for the baking and the decorating and such.

Bing, bang, boom...I'm working with a fantastic Nestie friend, Jody, who is developing a logo for me. And it's so darn cute!!! I'm totally in love with Jody right now.

It's four months later, and Ladybird Cakes is taking off. I have booked two wedding cakes.

Which kind of makes me want to hyperventilate. Wedding cakes...tiered...designs. And yet, I'm oh-so-thrilled and cannot believe that I am starting to make money from something I absolutely love to do. So now I am thinking about a blog for the business.

And yes, that is why I have been an absentee blogger. I've been working a lot on this. So, coming soon, a website for the business. But, until then, think of me if you need a cake.

Do You Know What Today Is...It's Our Anniversary!

2009-07-15T08:22:00.011-04:00

Happy Anniversary to the love of my life, the light of my days, the captain of my ship.

Three years ago today, I married the greatest of guys, and my life has been so full of joy and happiness ever since.

Happy Anniversary, David.

I love you very much!

Sweeping Out the Cobwebs

2009-07-10T22:31:00.003-04:00

Well, hello there! I remember you!!

Do you remember me?!?

Seriously, after several weeks without an update, I wouldn't be surprised if you all had up and disappeared. Now you know why my houseplants always seem to die.

I had an office plant once that defied botany. It was a cyclamen that never stopped blooming for the entire length of the job. And then, the day I left, it died. Kind of weird. It was like it appreciated the neglect. I would remember it every once in a while, and then water it. It literally died in my car on the drive home that last day.

Oooh, look! Something shiny!!!

And so goes my attention span. So, in the course of the last few weeks, my oldest brother got married, I learned of the death of someone I went to college with, I baked a really fun castle cake for my cousin's daughter, I completed a fondant cake course, Dave and I traveled to upstate New York for the 4th of July weekend, and then we both came down with summer colds.

It's been a busy few weeks. And the summer cold thing? Totally sucked the most. We're still getting over them, thank you very much to Dave's brother Rick. I'll be remembering this when I shop for Christmas.

Dave and I have our 3rd anniversary coming up on Wednesday. And the plan was to celebrate this weekend. But since we are still a bit under the weather and can't taste anything, I'm not really sure we'll be spending money on a fabulous dinner if we can't tell how fabulous it actually is. Oh well...pj party on the couch works too.

The cake thing is taking off and I am working with someone to design a logo. Once I have some business cards and a list of offerings, I'll be good to go. I'm excited about, since it's the thing I love to do most. Fingers crossed.

I'm getting sleepy, so I'll post the 4th of July photos tomorrow. Lyndonville outdid itself once again!

Thoughts From the Road

2009-07-02T22:25:00.001-04:00

I think bumper stickers that proclaim a driver's love for a pet are absolutely ridiculous.

"I love my boxer."

Thanks for the heads up. If it's your pet, you should love them. This coming from an animal-free home.

I want to see a bumper sticker that's a little more genuine.

"I tolerate my Irish Setter."

"If it weren't for a good groomer, my golden retriever would be an outside dog."

"I hate cats, but I love my wife."

I would crack up if I saw that. Wouldn't you?

2009-06-17T08:19:00.003-04:00

Remember that post a few months back about the crazy construction sign?

No?!? What do you mean, no?

Okay then, go back and refresh your memory. I'll just sit here and get over the fact that I'm not as memorable as I think.

Back already? Excellent!

Look what I found!!!

Nice, right? Here's his brother!

And his two cousins! A plethora of hilarious signage!

Ahhh, good times! Enjoy your day.

Tuesday Time-Waster

2009-06-16T13:22:00.003-04:00

Hey there, welcome to the Tuesday Time-Waster. It's a short one today, but hilarious, nonetheless.

Question: Are women born this way?

Answer: Apparently so!

YouTube...killing time for Kim since 2006.

That Can't Be Right

2009-06-11T22:28:00.001-04:00

Has anyone ever questioned which mountain they get Mountain Dew from? It's radioactive yellow, for crying out loud!

I don't think that's a mountain I want to visit.

Bring The Rain

2009-06-11T08:19:00.003-04:00

As I sit typing this, I can hear thunder from the coming storm. I love the rain, and I am so glad we are getting some. Our little suburb has been missed by most of the rain for the past couple of weeks, and our flowers are drooping. And not having to drag out the hose and watering cans is really nice.

For those of you wondering, I did manage to make it through my day yesterday without any further mishaps. And today is a new day!

One Of Those Days

2009-06-10T13:25:00.002-04:00

Yep, it's one of those days! I spilled tea on my shirt this morning. All down the front of me.

I knocked a pile of files off my desk.

I spilled salad dressing on my sweater at lunch.

I fear for the co-workers around me, that I might somehow collapse my cubicle.

If you see me today, do yourself a favor: Just wave from afar and move on.

The Tuesday Time-Waster

2009-06-09T13:03:00.003-04:00

I'd like to introduce you all to a new feature here at A Golfer and A Girl. The Tuesday Time-Waster. A brief interlude to chuckle at something.

Today's time-waster comes from YouTube. But first, a word from our sponsor.

YouTube...killing time for Kim since 2006.

Okay! Did any of you watch the Tony's last night? Me neither! Hey, I was shopping. Apparently Poison was a musical guest for reasons that haven't even begun to be determined. Our hero, Bret Michaels (he of Rock of STD Love fame), somehow screwed up the exit stage left/right instructions he received and instead exited straight back...into a moving prop. A moving prop that promptly flattened him. So, join with me in snickering at his very graceful face-plant. And all while being serenaded by Stockard Channing. Priceless.

Go ahead...watch it again. You know you want to. Look at his bandmates trying in vain to warn him.

Awesome.

Gramma's Hugs Are Best

2009-06-08T10:43:00.001-04:00

Sometimes, you just need to cuddle with Gramma!

Six Is An Interesting Number To Choose

2009-06-05T12:46:00.003-04:00

My friend, Andrea, from Holdin' Mama's Hand has tagged me in a couple of different posts. So I guess that means I have to stop being so lazy and get a post up. When my mom tells me that she is bored with my blog, it's time to do something.

Today's assignment is to name 6 unimportant things that make me happy. Seems like a breeze, right? But I realized when I started the list that lots of things that make me happy are important. Things like seeing Dave (husband is definitely important) and time with my family (ditto family). So I figured I would have to dig a little deeper.

So here they are, my 6 Unimportant Things That Make Me Happy:

1. Orange soda, specifically Orange Crush or Sunkist. Not the yucky mandarin orange stuff. It reminds me of summertime as a kid. Great memories, especially those glass bottles they used to come in.

2. When my cousins call me Kimmy. Not everyone can get away with it, but my cousins say it so naturally. It makes me feel like I'm part of their little kid club.

3. Watching fireworks, specifically in Lyndonville, NY during the 4th of July celebration. Nothing better! Sure, there might be bigger displays, but for a small town with a focus on a family celebration, this is the best.

4. Reading blogs...I have a really long list of blogs I follow. I find them interesting and funny. And they make my day.

5. That moment of evening between dusk and dark. Twilight. The sky is so beautiful then, like a painting. Soft light, soft sounds, the day is drawing to a close. And now that summer draws near, the air cools a bit then and it relaxes me.

6. Getting into my husband's car, and smelling his cologne on the seat belt. It's like getting a hug from him.

Now I am supposed to tag others, but most of the people on my list have already done this. So...if you are reading this and have not yet written such a post on your blog, consider yourself tagged.

No Pants-Off, Just Dance-Off

2009-05-28T11:49:00.002-04:00

I know I need to get a post up, but I've been a little preoccupied. Work and other stuff. So, to distract you, watch this video. A dance-off between two college baseball teams during a FIVE-HOUR rain delay! Hilarious!

YouTube...killing time for Kim since 2006.

I'd Like to Thank The Academy

2009-05-20T12:35:00.000-04:00

I'd like to send out a few thank yous to the people and things that made today such a rousing success so far.

First, the very large bottle of wine that Amy and I killed last night. You were yummy, and the perfect addition to girls night. We appreciate the sacrifice, but perhaps you could have warned me about the large headache you were inducing.

Second, my alarm clock. Your shrill beeping at 6:20, 6:25, 6:30, and 6:35 was certainly the way to start the day. Thanks for being so tenacious.

To the two police officers who blocked the left lane this morning during rush hour in order to run in and grab coffee...thanks so much, guys! I just wanted to let you know how helpful it was to have to switch lanes when it was bumper-to-bumper. Excellent! Hey, by the way, I'm heading home at 5pm and then I have to get to a class at 6:30pm. Perhaps you could block a lane on 670 for me then?

And finally, to the chucklehead on the phone first thing this morning who asked if I was Korean...thank you for letting me know I can be discriminated against simply because I have the same first name as a dictator. You're right, sir. Clearly I am to be lumped in the same category. What could my parents have been thinking?

My Gramma's Birthday

2009-05-15T23:31:00.001-04:00

Today was my gramma's 84th birthday! I completely concur with our waitress who, when told how old Gramma was, replied incredulously "Nuh uh!".

I think we all have an age or time that we stick our family members at. To me, my Gramma is in her 60s, my mom is 40-something, which makes me up past my bedtime!

I'm so lucky that my Gramma has been such a formative part of my life. I like to think I have some of my independence and spirit from her. She fought breast cancer and kicked its ass, while at the same time took care of my grampa when he was dying of heart disease. She watched her second husband fight stomach and liver cancer which ultimately took his life. She has an iron will and a spine of steel. She laughs in the face of osteoporosis, arthritis and a genetic predisposition for strokes.

And, most importantly, she laughs at all of my jokes. I love her with a fierceness that is reserved for only the most important people in my life.

One of my favorite memories is from the morning of my wedding day. It was 6am and I couldn't sleep. I went out to the living room and she was sitting there. She and I talked about the past, the present and the future. We laughed, we cried. And I realized that no matter how old I get, I am still her grandbaby. And I am proud to carry that title.

Happy Birthday, Gramma! I love you so very much.

Big News

2009-05-11T12:48:00.003-04:00

No, I'm not pregnant.

My mom is engaged! As in, getting married! To a really great gentleman who treats me like his own daughter. I'm so thrilled for her. I knew it was coming, but wasn't sure exactly when. I got a call from her Friday night as I was driving home to Cleveland.

I finally saw the ring this morning and it is gorgeous.

I am so happy. And I get to help plan a wedding that isn't my own. Hooray!

Congratulations, Mom. I am so happy for you and Don!

I Don't Have A Problem...I Can Quit Anytime I Want!

2009-05-09T20:57:00.003-04:00

Oh lord, folks...I got a Blackberry this weekend! Add me to the legions of people who have gotten hooked. Seriously, I've had the thing for about 6 hours and I have barely put it down. I'm probably going to need to set some boundaries. Maybe a daily time limit or something.

It's so cute, though! It's a Curve. Dave says we should call it the Blackberry Gouge. He's a funny boy when it comes to our cell bill!

Its sweet, siren song has been calling to me for a few months. I rationalized getting it by explaining how it will help me stay connected now that I don't have internet at home during the week. Which translates to I need to be on Facebook and this blog after hours, so there!

Here's the transcript of a conversation Dave and I just had about the phone:

Dave: Does it have the pointer-thinger...the tick-tick-tick thing?

Me: No, it has the flick-flick-flick thing and the ch-ch-ch-ch-ch thing. No tick-tick-tick- tick though.

Dave: Oh, I thought you wanted a tick-tick-tick thinger.

Me: I don't need it.

I dare you to try to figure out what the heck we were talking about. We understood each other, but we both may be a little bit insane. A healthy level of insanity is required for marriage, right?

Right?!?

Hey, can someone let me out of this room? I don't like padded walls.

Here's Something Funny...My Commute!

2009-05-07T12:22:00.002-04:00

This is my view, every day, going to and from work. Brake lights, bumper to bumper, as far as the eye can see. And this picture was taken on a rainy afternoon, which meant the pace was even slower. And yes, I was stopped when I took the photo.

Every day. Bumper to bumper. Columbus needs rail service or 3 more lanes on every highway in each direction.

Was That A Tumbleweed Rolling By?

2009-05-05T17:00:00.002-04:00

I hate writer's block! It keeps me from waxing poetic on this blog. Rest assured I am trying to come up with some funny posts to keep you entertained. But, until my mind connects, it's just the sound of crickets around here.

Hey!

You!

In the corner!

I hear you snoring!!!

Yes, Another Post About Cake!

2009-04-30T14:01:00.005-04:00

I did this!!! Can you believe it?!? And the really amazing thing is that I carried this cake from the house to the car, the car to class, class to the car, car to the house, house to the car, and, finally, from the car to work. And all without dropping it. I felt like one of those contestants on the Food Network Cake Challenge, where they have to lift their 700 lb. cake and carry it to a separate table for display.

Except, you know, my cake was less than a pound. And in a convenient carrier. And only two layers. But still!

Last night was the end of Course 1 at Wilton University. I'm totally telling everyone I'm taking classes. What's that, you want to meet for drinks? Sorry, can't. I have class tonight at the university. We're learning royal icing techniques. The professor is a real stickler!

Actually, I am already enrolled in Course 2 which starts next week. I only have to make one cake for this class. And the instructor, Denise, could not be nicer! I highly recommend taking the classes with her at the Michael's at Easton. She made the first course so much fun.

At Least Blame The Right Thing

2009-04-26T16:12:00.003-04:00

All week long, I have been avoiding the discussion of the Miss USA debacle because, quite frankly, I just don't care. Really. But that doesn't mean I have no opinion. And here it is: Miss California, you didn't lose the pageant because your answer upset Perez Hilton. You lost because your answer was convoluted and nonsensical.

And, you lost because of these earrings!

Sweetheart, they are hideous.

And can we talk for a second about gracious losing? Stop doing interviews where you claim the only reason you lost was because of your answer. Hello?!? That's why they ask the questions! To weed out the ones who don't quite measure up. Why not say something like "The new Miss USA is a great choice. She will be a terrific ambassador for the organization."

Lie if you must. You're a pageant veteran after all. But stop sounding all sour grapes about the whole thing. You sound like you're being interviewed right before 4th period English class at Pretty Pretty Princess Middle School.

If I were the new Miss USA, I'd track California down and throw Donald Trump's combover at her.

Let Them Eat Chocolate Fudge Cake

2009-04-23T15:14:00.006-04:00

This is cake #2. Devil's Food with a chocolate fudge center. It's rich and sinful.

Go on...admit it. You want a piece.

It's okay.

I know.

It's a Cake!

2009-04-22T13:09:00.003-04:00

I just realized I totally forgot to post about cake class last week. I was so wrapped up in Mom's birthday and Dad's medical issues that it completely slipped my mind.

I was amazed at how relaxing the class was. And I discovered I have a steady hand when it comes to the techniques. I have class again tonight. I promise, I'll do better at timely posting.

I made a lemon cake with raspberry filling for last class. I wasn't crazy about the icing, so I am adding butter this week to see if that is an improvement. Those are tulips, in case you are florally-challenged.

This week it's chocolate cake with a fudge filling.

What Can I Say, I'm Easy To Please

2009-04-20T14:10:00.008-04:00

Those are Spearmint Tic Tacs. I love me some Spearmint Tic Tacs. All other Tic Tacs pale in comparison.

Do you know how hard it is to find these in stores? They are elusive, people! And elusive is not good for someone who is totally addicted to them. Not good at all!

Now, let me tell you how crafty my mother is...she managed to find these. Where, you ask? Why, at the Der Dutchman restaurant in Plain City. She is good, I tell you! She found them last year at Cedar Point, too.

Usually I have to buy them online in bulk. Not today, though! And that slight shift you felt at 1:35pm Eastern Time today? That was the world righting itself now that these babies are in my possession.

A Great-Grand Dream

2009-04-20T13:13:00.004-04:00

Last week, I dreamt about my great-grandmother, whose name was Roma. Isn't that a great name? She passed away when I was barely 4, so I don't have a lot of concrete memories of her. But the dream was incredibly detailed. Her blue eyes were striking, and very kind. I always had the impression that she was very gentle. And while most of my memories involve her being in a nursing home, I do remember being in her house as a small child.

She used to keep old-fashioned butter mints around and I loved them! I remember trying to sneak into the kitchen to get them. She kept them on a high shelf, and I pulled drawers out from the floor to the counter to climb up and get them. Amazingly, I didn't hurt myself. My clumsiness is well known.

I have no idea why I dreamt about her, but I've had several people tell me she is trying to send a message or there is something in my subconscious I'm trying to remember about her. Whatever the reason, the dream gave me such a feeling of happiness. I didn't realize how much I missed her. My nieces and nephews are so lucky that they have a great-grandmother in their lives. One who is active and very present for them. Most people aren't that lucky.

Roma was the mother of the gramma I live with now. I can remember drinking out of pink glasses like the photo below since I was very small. It turns out these glasses belonged to Great-Gramma Roma. It's amazing to me that Gramma lets us drink out of them. What a treasure they are.

I'll have to see if I can find some photos of her to post.

Grace and Charm...That's Me!

2009-04-17T14:08:00.002-04:00

I love Chipotle! I super pink puffy-heart Chipotle. A steak fajita burrito bol makes my entire week! Add guacamole and I'm in sheer bliss! But let me tell you what I don't love. I don't love the guy who decides that lunch time is the perfect moment to mop the floor in the Chipotle in German Village.

Listen, fella, look at my feet. See the cute, peep-toe red heels? Okay, now travel up. See me? Hey, my eyes are up here, buddy! Anyway, I'm clumsy on a good day. I'm thrilled to get through my day without tripping. So, let's do a little math to figure this out.

Chipotle Floor + Mopping = Slick Surface.

Slick Surface + Kim + Red Peep-Toe Heels = Disaster

Yes, I managed to make it out of the place unscathed. I stayed upright and didn't slip at all. Of course, that's only because I used the ledge to steady myself. If I crash in the Chipotle because of a wet floor, think I can get free Chipotle out of it? More than 1 or 2, I mean.

I noticed today that when I say the word "fabulous, " I use jazz hands. What is that about? And when did I start?

It's a beautiful day here in the capital city. Sun is shining, people are in a good mood. Spring has sprung, people. I think there should be mandatory work release on Fridays that are this beautiful. Can somebody get on this for me?

Have a great weekend, everybody!

National Healthcare Decisions Day

2009-04-16T08:17:00.000-04:00

Today is National Healthcare Decisions Day, a day to focus on your decisions regarding end-of-life care. Hospice of the Western Reserve has asked for bloggers to donate space on their blogs today to discuss their end-of-life wishes. I've been thinking a lot about this over the last week, and I realized I've never had this discussion with my husband, or any of my family members. Part of it may be the idea that discussing such an unpleasant topic is uncomfortable for people. Most people don't want to dwell on the thought of their own demise. But since we don't live forever, we really should stop and think about what we want done.

For me, the thought of being kept alive artificially holds no allure. Medical advances being what they are, I trust that doctors should know what constitutes a vegetative state. And I don't want to be in that state. Nor do I want my husband or family to have to decide what to do. I feel that I am the best person to decide what I want to happen to myself, and I would rather decide that now. While I am not 100% comfortable stating my exact wishes here, rest assured it is included in my planning.

It is important for me to maintain dignity throughout the process. I should be the one to make the plan, not someone for me. And not, God forbid, someone for political gain as in some of the more well-known cases.

I used this link to prepare an Advanced Directive to prepare for such an event. And I am going to sit down with my husband so we can discuss our wishes together. But it doesn't stop there. I also plan on sharing this information with my family (Mom, Dad, etc.) so they know my wishes as well. The idea of a tug-of-war over top of my hospital bed is enough to make me crazy, and I will not allow that to happen. Not if I can help it.

I hope that by posting this, it inspires you to have this conversation as well. It is so critically important, but it takes a very small amount of time.

Wednesday Wrap-Up

2009-04-16T07:42:00.002-04:00

Thanks for all of your good thoughts yesterday. I am happy to report that my Dad did fine with his procedure and will be released from the hospital sometime today. I have rediscovered that I am not good at waiting...not at all. But I do have to give a big thumbs up to the people at Mt. Carmel East Heart Center. From the moment we stepped in the door until I left last night, the entire staff was incredibly caring and compassionate. And the waiting room was actually comfortable. Cushy chairs and recliners, TVs...a nice place to sit if you have to.

My mom had a good birthday. The big celebration with us will be Saturday evening, but she went out to dinner with her "friend" Don last night. I feel bad that her birthday got a bit overshadowed, but this way, she gets to spread the celebration out. That's not really all that bad.

Happy Birthday to My Mom!

2009-04-15T08:00:00.000-04:00

Today is a big day in our family. April 15th is my mom's birthday! We have never looked at this date with loathing due to the IRS that so many of you do. Instead, it's a day of celebration.

Mom would like you all to believe she is 39, but that would mean she was a very small child when she had me. However, just for today, I'll indulge this wish.

So, Happy 39th Birthday, Mom! I love you very much and I hope your day is everything you want it to be! And if you can stretch your celebration from a day to a week, then even better.

This Just In...

2009-04-14T12:49:00.002-04:00

I found a Hershey Bar with Almonds in the back of my desk. A whole bar! Score!!!

Mmmmmmm...chocolate.

That is all. You may now return to your regularly scheduled day.

Golf, A Good Walk...Oh, Who Am I Kidding? I Rode In The Cart!

2009-04-13T07:56:00.002-04:00

Good Monday morning, everybody! Of course, it's gray and dreary, so maybe not such a good morning, but it's the salutation that counts. What a jam-packed weekend!

I spent Saturday morning baking a coconut cake and setting up the house for the Easter celebration on Sunday. Then, I drove up to OakHaven Golf Course in Delaware to watch Dave's golf team battle the elements. It could have been worse, weather-wise, but it was still pretty crappy. The only redeeming factor was the sun shone all afternoon. But the wind! Dreadful and cold. I absolutely froze. I managed to stay just above hypothermia levels until the very end, when the sun started to droop down and the wind kicked up. That's when the shivering and teeth-chattering started. And, you all know, once that happens, you've passed the point of no return. I was so happy to get back into the car and turn the heat on.

But even with the weather, I still had a great time. I got to see Dave's team, and they are a great group of guys. All very funny, very nice. Golfers are a little different when it comes to college behavior. I also got to see a couple of our old friends. Dave and I know the coach from Mt. Union College. I miss him so much now that I am in Columbus, so it was a great surprise to see him there. We also got to see one of Dave's former golfers who lives down here. All in all, a good day. Of course, if the temperature had been about ten degrees warmer with no wind, that would have been perfect. But considering that this tournament had a snow delay last year, I'm not going to dwell.

Yesterday, most of the family converged on Gramma's for the annual Easter Dinner. This year we had 21 people ranging in age from 90-something to 1 month. Dave wasn't able to make it since he had the golf tournament and got home late Saturday. We had the requisite egg hunt, along with some fabulous food. Ham, cheesy potatoes, mac and cheese, green bean casserole, homemade rolls...the works! Yummy delicious. Thank goodness we don't eat like that every weekend!

This is the week of Dad's procedure, so I am a little preoccupied with that. I went to see him last night and got the rundown of his medications. Nothing makes you grow up faster then having to discuss living wills and powers of attorney with a parent. And while I don't expect we'll need to worry about anything, it doesn't hurt to be prepared.

Fingers crossed for a good week.

And Now, Fluff

2009-04-10T08:18:00.004-04:00

In light of the last post, I thought I'd put something on here a little less weighty!

My favorite line of dialogue from last night's episode of Bones:

Booth: "We have to stop hanging out with geniuses, or you're going to figure out how dumb I am."

Brennan: "Don't worry about that! I figured out how dumb you were a long time ago."

National Healthcare Decisions Day

2009-04-10T08:01:00.002-04:00

I'm taking a break from the normally light-hearted and ridiculous fluff I post to bring you something important to think about. Next Thursday, April 16th, is National Healthcare Decisions Day. It's a day in which to stop and reflect on what you would want to happen in the event of your catastrophic illness or injury.

I know...I KNOW! It's not a fun topic. Nobody likes to think about what horrible things could happen to themselves. But, what if something did? Have you communicated your wishes to your loved ones? Do they know what you want to happen? Do you want to ask someone to make such difficult decisions when they are emotionally wrought? Neither do I! And since I am in the middle of helping my Dad prepare documents that address these issues in advance of his procedure next week, it is obviously very timely for me.

Hospice of the Western Reserve (Cleveland) has a project they are coordinating for this event. They are asking bloggers to post their wishes on their blog. Here is the information my friend Paige sent me:

April 16th—yes, the day after taxes—is National Healthcare Decisions Day. As a part of this initiative, Hospice of the Western Reserve would like to invite you to share your wishes in the event of a tragedy on your blog.

You’ve heard about the high profile cases: Terri Schiavo, Karen Ann Quinlan and Nancy Cruzan. All were young women, and none of them established their end of life wishes before being faced with tragedy.

The younger you are, the more important it is to plan ahead. Although the likelihood that they will be needed is not as great, the severity of the consequences is greater.

If you’re interested in raising awareness for advance care planning among young professionals in Cleveland, let me know and I can send you Courage in Conversation and/or set you up with someone from our team to discuss. I’ll be posting on my personal blog on April 16, too, and will be providing links to participating blogs/columns on our website, HospiceWR.org. I’d like to invite you to link back to this page on your blog, too.

Here are some questions to get you going:
• What is most important for you in your life right now?
• What are your most important hopes?
• What do you hope to avoid most of all?
• Which options would you prefer?
• Attempt cure; use all appropriate interventions.
• Give curative treatments where appropriate and manage other conditions; avoid aggressive interventions.
• Keep me comfortable and emphasize quality of what time remains; avoid potentially life-prolonging interventions.

If you have a blog, please consider participating as well as having this conversation with your loved ones. If you don't have a blog, just have the talk. There is additional information on preparing advanced directives on this site.

Thanks, everyone!

Who Is Your Never?

2009-04-09T13:24:00.005-04:00

So, the cake class! Lots of fun. And the best part, besides making yummy cakes? My friend, Staci, is in it as well. I didn't even know she was going to be there. It was like that moment in college when you're in a class of complete strangers, and then that one familiar face arrives and you realize how great it's going to be.

Staci and I became acquaintances when we were planning our weddings. We were both on a local board on The Knot. Because of Staci's recommendation, we ended up with an awesome and affordable DJ at our wedding. And, for that, I will be eternally grateful to Staci.

Last night before bed, I was listening to some music I had downloaded. Blue October has released a new album and there is a song called "My Never" which is incredible. (I have to apologize for the link, though. It's the only one I can find that isn't completely awful since I just discovered that the song will be in the "New Dawn" movie.) Beautiful, moving lyrics, completely relatable. I think everybody has a "Never." Someone who didn't work out. A relationship that was wrong in the timing. A person you were sure you would end up with, but you didn't. And, when I look back, I am so happy that things worked out the way they did. I would gladly trade my never for my forever. But I'm also glad that my never was in my life at one point. All the twists and turns, the somersaults...they were worth it, to get me onto the path I needed to be on. To make me who I am.

If you are in Columbus, you may read The Other Paper. I have some friends on the cover.

Don't they look great? Like they are having such a good time? They were partying after the New Kids On The Block concert last Friday. I love their custom-made t-shirts. No, I don't know all of them, but the ones I do are so freaking hilarious, so very nice, and let's face it, so darn cute. Makes me almost sorry I wasn't a fan of New Kids back in the day.

Shout out to my friend, Randy! He turns 35 today. Happy Birthday, buddy!! May you get to watch all the Master's Tournament you can stand this weekend.

Seasons Change, Men Decorate Cakes

2009-04-08T12:54:00.002-04:00

For those of you who have asked, yes, my week is definitely better than my weekend! So far, I have managed to avoid wearing food or drink, injuring myself, or crashing my vehicle. And now that I have put that in writing, you know one of those things is bound to happen. Because that is Murphy's Law.

Speaking of Murphy's Law, when I was in grade-school, I had a classmate whose last name was Murphy. In gym class, when we were playing basketball, she named her team "Murphy's Law." And I found that just so funny because, really, if you are looking to be successful, you probably don't want to use that particular name. Gee, what a nerd I was. I was probably the only one to find it funny, because nobody else thought about it. And now that I think about it, she was a really good athlete, so her team probably won the tournament. She was the prettiest girl in class, too. And she looks exactly the same now. How unfair is that? Well, I've managed to depress myself. I'm awesome.

Moving on!

It would be great if you guys could think some positive thoughts for my father. It turns out he may have a blockage creating issues in the lower chambers of his heart, so he will be going in for a procedure next week to fix the issue. Crossed fingers or prayers will also be appreciated. You know...whatever your thing might be.

Tonight is the first night of my cake decorating class. Let's hope, upon completion, I have skills in that area. Otherwise, I may end up on this site. Of course, I'm not a professional, nor do I plan to be. A friend of mine told me he had taken the class. And I am ashamed to admit that I found that surprising. Me! A totally independent, do your own thing, don't let gender get in your way kind of person. I didn't, for an instant, think guys would be in the class. And that shames me. I'm hanging my head right now, wallowing in the shameful shame-i-ness. Sigh. So very sorry, my totally heterosexual friend who just wanted to make fabulous cakes. Will you tutor me if I need help?!?

Work has been busy. Training in earnest to get up to speed on my job. Lots to learn, and I need to know something about everything that my employer does. A jack of all trades. I'm quickly learning what I like, and what I hate. But, overall, a lot of like, and very, very little hate. I feel so lucky to have such a great place to work, with really fabulous co-workers. It's a nice feeling.

Spring is here, in spite of the snowfall earlier this week. Driving down Broad Street in Columbus yesterday, the sun was shining and the blossoms were out on the trees. There is nothing prettier that spring-flowering trees. Just when you think you cannot stand anymore gray or brown dreariness, voila! Pink and white blossoms, green buds. Everyone is happier.

And, if you're like me, you know what's next!

Orange construction barrels!!!

A Little Black Rain Cloud

2009-04-06T12:52:00.004-04:00

Pretty craptastic weekend I just had. Who knew I would be so happy for Monday. Suffice it to say, it was not fun. I'll spare you the details, but I'll sum it up for you. On my drive back to Columbus last night, I stopped to get something to drink at a drive-thru. As the worker handed my drink to me (a large, mind you), the bottom of the cup gave way and I ended up with iced tea and ice all over me. My shirt and pants were soaked, as was my seat. Good times. I just sat there, looking at myself, cracking up. Because really, at that point, it was either laugh or cry. And if I cried, I probably would have ended up at a real drive-thru for some type of adult beverage. And that would have ended badly, I can assume.

The poor girl at the window was mortified! I'm sure she thought I was going to yell at her, but it wasn't her fault. In her defense, she did offer to give me extra napkins. That was a fun drive home, I tell you. Serves me right. Clearly fate was out to get me.

Ever have a bad-luck moment? Or, in my case, a bad-luck weekend? I need a get-away from my get-away.

Here's What Made Me Laugh Out Loud Today

2009-04-04T19:32:00.002-04:00

The fundamental difference between the sexes, and proof you don't need to understand the language to get the message:

This one is three years old, but still cracks me up!

Dave wants me to include this, and I admit, it is so freaking funny!

Here's another Sprint..."This, in here, and we're outta here! Buckle up, dudes!"

YouTube...killing time for Kim since 2006.

This Much I Know

2009-04-03T20:55:00.010-04:00

1. While I might agree that most of Bruce Springsteen's songs *might* sound alike, I think it's un-American to say so.

2. I think that anyone who says "You would understand if you had kids" to a lady who has fertility issues should be smacked across the face twice; once to get their attention and the second to drive home the point.

3. Bra companies need to do a better job designing bras for those of us who have (ahem) ample cleavage. We would like to wear cute bras, too. Can someone get on this?!?

4. I really feel that people who tell you the book was better than the movie should be laughed at..of course the book was better than the movie! How pretentious can you get?

5. Payroll administrators are sexy in a "you get paid because of me" kind of way.

6. I miss Wendy the Snapple Lady.

7. I think chicken sandwiches from Winking Lizard are crazy delicious!

8. If a car is driving beside you and it's a Lexus, chances are pretty good it's going to cut you off.

9. I'm really not sure how whisking mayo twice will make it taste better.

10. And I think it's gonna be a long long time, till touch down brings me round again to find, I'm not the man they think I am at home. Oh no no no I'm a rocket man.

11. You shouldn't complain about the cost of Girl Scout Cookies. It's a FUNDRAISER, for crying out loud!

12. I would just about kill for spearmint Tic-Tacs.

13. I'm longing for a warm beach.

Spoiled?!? Surely, You Jest!

2009-04-03T12:49:00.003-04:00

Some of you may remember that while Dave and I are living apart, I am staying with my Gramma and Mom during the week. It's pretty great that dinner is on the table when I get home, and my sheets are freshly-laundered every Sunday night. And the fact that, sometimes, my Gramma packs my lunch for me cannot be discounted in the slightest.

Okay, I am a *bit* spoiled. But I love the fact that I have this time with both of them. It's time I'll never regret, even though I am separated from Dave during the week. It's a trade-off, and I have to believe that we are on this path for a reason. Fingers crossed that he finds a job here soon. Until that happens, I'm incredibly lucky to have family that has room for me.

I love the fact that we laugh every single night. We share funny stories. Gramma told me a story about lipstick one night that had me in tears. Even now, thinking about it, I chuckle. And I'm so glad, I'm so thankful that the three of us enjoy being around each other.

How Do You Even Spell Blogiversary?

2009-04-03T08:20:00.002-04:00

Today is Julie's Blogiversary over at 47 and Starting Over. Please do me a great big favor and go over to her blog. She's trying to get to 100 comments today, so go leave a note!

Thanks!

Not In The Mood

2009-04-02T08:23:00.003-04:00

Today is one of those days, people. I woke up in a foul mood for whatever reason, and so far it hasn't gotten any better. I opened my yogurt at my desk and that stupid lid just launched yogurt all over. How it does this I will never know.

My cranberry juice tastes wrong. My favorite hand lotion is missing. I broke a nail getting in the car, then broke another getting out.

This may not be my day.

More later.

Bobby Knight? You Know He's Crazy, Right?

2009-04-01T12:29:00.000-04:00

Someone showed me this ad yesterday, and I honestly don't know how I missed it during the copious hours of basketball I have been watching lately. Have you seen it? Hilarious!!

But then there's more, which I just saw today!

So here is the question of the day. Who wins? Bobby Knight or James Hetfield?

It's Chanel, For Goodness Sakes!

2009-04-01T08:25:00.004-04:00

I am one of those typical girly-girls, who has 212 pairs of shoes, 1100 tubes of lipstick, and multiple fragrances for whatever the occasion. And while I do wear all of the shoes and I try to use all of the lipstick, my fragrance collection is rather...well, dusty. I use one or two regularly. The rest.....meh.

I decided I should probably get rid of the ones I never wear, and pare down a bit. Gone are the half-used bottles of what was I thinking, you've got to be kidding, and the Bath and Body Works Collection that no longer exists in the store. And can someone explain to me why they only discontinue the scents I like? That drives me crazy!

Anyway, I decided to wear my "special-occasion" perfume this morning. Chanel No. 5. Love it! It was the perfume I wore at my wedding. It was the perfume my mom wore for her special occasions. It makes me feel grown-up and sophisticated. But when I mentioned what I was wearing to someone when she asked, she kind of made a face. And it made me think of an NCIS episode when a character asked if anyone wore Chanel No. 5 anymore. Do they? Am I old-fashioned for loving it? And here's the bigger question...do I even care?

Regardless, I smell fabulous!

So Much for That Graceful Aging Thing

2009-03-31T08:18:00.005-04:00

Let me tell you what depresses me! This weekend, while hanging out with Dave and his golf team (college), Dave and I were telling stories. And I told the story of the time that Dave and I were in the car, driving to Columbus, and I started singing "Check baby, check baby, 1 2 3 4." Do you remember the song? Wreckx-N-Effect?? Anyone?!? Yes, I know! The song is called "Rumpshaker," and what the heck was I doing singing that song I will never know. But it popped in my head that day in the car. So I finish the whole countdown and Dave turns to me and says "If you have to check the damn thing ten times, the SOB* is broken." Which made me laugh so hard that I cried for the next few miles

*abbreviation used to prevent offending blog readers.

So I tell the story, and these guys look at me as if waiting for the punchline. They had NO IDEA what the song was. And then, as if in unison, two guys get their laptops out and start searching for it on Google. It was so sad, because I didn't think the song was THAT old. Except that, yes, it was from college, and yes, that was a few years (13) ago. And YES, these guys were like 6 or 7 years old. But still!

All those times I got carded recently? Down the drain, I tell you. Those guys just stared at me. Tell me again, Kim, about the time the dinosaurs rocked the greek mixer. Whatever. That song was played at every event! That and Salt-N-Pepa, which reminds me of one night at the TKE house, but that's a story for another day.

I'm off to search for lines on my face.

Princess Palmer

2009-03-29T09:22:00.003-04:00

Let me tell you about my niece, Palmer. She is such a hoot! She'll be three on June 2nd, but she already acts like a little adult. She has the most gorgeous hair...a brilliant, beautiful red that a lot of women would kill for.

Palmer recently discovered Barbie when her daddy brought a DVD home for her. And, like so many others before her, Palmer suddenly wished for the long, blonde hair that is Barbie's trademark. As my sister-in-law said, that damn Barbie ruins everything. I chuckled when I heard her say that, but I am sad that Palmer is already deciding at such a young age that something about her should be changed. And even though she also will probably forget she said that just as fast, it still makes me nervous. I remember longing for the same hair long ago, and even today, still have wistful moments when I wish for something other than what I have. But, this post is about Palmer.

Palmer, my incredibly independent niece. My sweet, persnickety, Dora-loving, hilariously-funny, soprano-voiced niece. The one who sings "Crinkle, Crinkle Little Star." Petite, serious, porcelain-faced, chocolate-milk loving little girl. Grumpy at times, always particular. She has had a personality as large as life from day one. She makes me laugh all the time. She is funny, most of the time intentionally, already demonstrating a phenomenal sense of humor. Her imagination is huge, and, I hope, still relatively untapped. I can only imagine what live has in store for her. Or, more accurately, what Palmer has in store for life!

Cheers!

2009-03-28T23:15:00.004-04:00

This weekend marks the first tournament in Dave's spring season, which means no trip to Cleveland for me. I met him and the guys for dinner tonight in Mt Vernon, then drove to my brother and sister-in-law's house to prepare food for my Dad's birthday dinner tomorrow. Potato salad tonight, pies tomorrow. I'm embracing my inner domestic goddess. In fact, I think I could be a good 1950's housewife. I love the fabulous dresses, I look good in pancake make-up and matte red lipstick, and I can down the vodka like nobody's business. Get me some valium and I'm there!

I picked up the Pearl Jam re-release last night on a shopping spree. Spree is defined very loosely...it also included two shirts, MAC primer, and a new journal. The CD? It's awesome. Incredible tracks, new music. The only thing that sucked was that the CD player in my car stopped working, so I had to wait until today to listen to it. I really need to get that thing fixed.

March Madness moves on and my bracket is in flames. That's not so awful; it happens every year. What stinks is that the person who picked Siena over my Buckeyes also made a few other picks which trumped mine. Retribution will be swift. It's one thing to win one game but to absolutely trounce my bracket on your own? Unacceptable.

The birthday week is almost over. It will soon be followed by the treadmill week, then the step up the cardio week and so on, to counteract the massive amount of sweets I've eaten. My new boss turned 50 on Wednesday and, suffice it to say, I made a piggy of myself that day as well. There was just so much to eat. Except coffee cake.

Let me tell you the coffee cake story. It's a good one.

Wednesday morning, my co-worker and mentor (and all-around funny girl), Virginia, was carrying a coffee cake from the parking garage to our department for the birthday foodfest. She loaded herself down and set off for the stairwell. At the door, disaster struck. The load shifted and the dish with the coffee cake plummeted to its demise. That dish broke into a jillion pieces. I would have loved to have overheard the streak of words coming out of her mouth when it happened. She brushed the shards to the side in one pile, and called building services to let them know. On Friday, it was still there. Like a little memorial. Here lies Ginny's suicidal coffee cake.

Tomorrow I'll be writing about my niece, Palmer. She just discovered Barbie, and I'll say this...that damn doll ruins everything.

Happy Birthday!!!

2009-03-26T08:18:00.003-04:00

My husband, Dave, has a big birthday today! He's 40!!!

His boss was nice enough to let him out of work early today so he can drive down and have dinner with me. I'm so glad I get to see him on his actual birthday.

Honey, I love you! I hope your birthday is exactly what you want it to be. I cannot wait until I see you tonight.

Love,
Me

A Lesson in Making Grocery Lists UPDATED

2009-03-26T08:12:00.005-04:00

Last night's rundown:

Go to Giant Eagle to order birthday cake for Saturday, pick up cake for Thursday, get supplies for potluck at work. Get soaked in pouring rain walking from car to door and back again because umbrella is missing.

Drive home.

Realize I forgot ice cream for Thursday's cake. Stop at Kroger. Get soaked again walking from car to store and back.

Drive home.

Realize I forgot key ingredient for potluck recipe. Drive back to Kroger. Get soaked walking to door. Get heckled by Kroger greeter who comments that I was just there.

Stop, give fish-eye to greeter, thank him for pointing that out. Get ingredient, walk back to car in rain. Get in car, shut door, rain stops. Notice umbrella is under a bag in the backseat.

I am awesome, am I not?

UPDATED: And speaking of my awesomeness, how about the fact that the title should have read A Lesson in Grammar, since I had such an obvious error. It has been corrected, and thank you to that one person who pointed it out. For those of you that noticed and just laughed, I can appreciate that too!

Just For This Moment

2009-03-25T08:03:00.007-04:00

Last night, after work, as I was heading to the driving range to hit a few balls, I passed the funniest sign I've seen in a while.

Okay, I understand that a lot of you may need a moment to digest that last statement and stifle the laughter. Yes, it is true I have very little athletic ability. I'm happy if I can stay upright walking down the hall. So the thought of me swinging a blunt instrument to create a flying projectile that could end up God knows where might be a little overwhelming. Chuckle away, but I'm only giving you ten more seconds. Okay, STOP!

Okay, the sign! It was attached to a construction zone on Sunbury Road and said "No Electrocution Zone." I thought I read it wrong, so I did the Scooby-Doo "WHAT?!?" head-shake. But I read it correctly the first time.

So it begs the question, exactly where is the "Electrocution Zone?" Is it negotiated into the workers' contracts that certain areas be deemed as electrocution-free zones. What happens if you get electrocuted in a "No Electrocution Zone?" Are you ticketed? Some kind of citation.

But I do get the meaning. The point is that if you put the message up where people will read it, it makes them be more careful. A self-fulfilling prophecy. If you say it, over and over, it will happen. It's a good lesson. Learn to live in the moment. Conscious of what is happening.

And take it a step further. I've been inspired by some other bloggers recently who are finding the good things that happen every day. Seizing on moments of joy and laughter, love, even absurdity. The things that happen on your daily journey that make you stop, or provoke a response. So, I am going to remember the great moments throughout my day, and replay them at night when the day is through.

I had some great moments yesterday. A phone conversation with Dave that made us both laugh when I told him I didn't want to hit golf balls from the grass because I didn't want my brand-new super cute golf shoes to get dirty. A moment at work when I smiled after helping someone who just needed help, and I had the privilege of being that person. Reliving memories with an old and dear friend. Awesome onion straws at dinner. Asparagus that was cooked perfectly. Going to bed smiling, and waking up with the smile still there.

And now sharing these things with you.

Why Yes, I Am A Sexy Scientist, Thank You Very Much

2009-03-22T11:22:00.005-04:00

I was recently compared to the lead character on the TV show, Bones. At first, I wasn't sure what to think about that, because if you've seen the show, she's kind of quirky. Not that quirky is a bad thing! But after further reflection, I've decided to take it as a compliment. First of all, she's incredibly smart. She's also strikingly beautiful. And sexy in a scientific way. Not that I, for an instant, consider myself either of those things. But I don't mind at all being compared to someone like her, even if she's a fictional character. In fact, it really made my day.

And we all have quirks. Little things we do or say. Rituals that get us through the day. For instance, when I think of the word laundry in my head, I think of it in a British accent. I have no idea why. Somebody, at some point, must have said it to me that way and it lodged in my mind. Dave has a friend from Australia and I love the way he says my husband's name. When I write Dave's full name on something, I think of the way Sean pronounces it. That's a little quirky.

I was writing Dave's name on a form this week, and when the woman who took it glanced down, she asked me if I knew my husband had two first names.

Ummm, yes? Funny enough, we had to disclose our last names to each other when we applied for the marriage license. I'm thinking we need to give our kids last names as firsts to counteract.

Ooops, left turn there.

I'm sure there are more quirks that I have. I'm not going to put too much thought into it, though. I'm just going to assume the person meant the comparison positively, and I'll embrace it.

What kind of quirks do you have?

Somebody's Disappointed

2009-03-22T02:14:00.003-04:00

Two blogs in 5 hours! Who knew?

I was just looking at my analytics for the blog. I don't normally have keyword activity, but some poor soul typed "pssst table-dance" into Google and somehow found my blog! I am giggling uncontrollably here.

Listen, kind reader who I am sure did not want to end up here, I apologize!! I am so sorry this happened.

Now I'm off to try it myself.

UPDATE: My blog is listed third down from the top. Amazing! I can't buy this kind of exposure. Of course, what are the chances anyone else will do that?!?

Son, She Said, Have I Got a Little Story For You

2009-03-21T21:26:00.002-04:00

As per usual, lots of things to catch up on. But first, for those of you paying attention, you may recognize the title of this blog as a line of lyrics from Pearl Jam. I'm so excited that they are re-releasing their album, Ten, this week. It's 2 CDs and a DVD with extra tracks. Pearl Jam got me through college...I remember listening to them all the time. Parsing songs with my friend, Kerrie. Joking about my upcoming marriage to Eddie Vedder, which obviously didn't happen.

And as I was typing this, my actual husband told me he doesn't like Pearl Jam. I need a moment to catch my breath and recover from the stroke he just gave me.

Okay, better now!

Anyway, I'm pumped for the purchase. And speaking of the early to mid-90's, I just reconnected via Facebook with a great friend from college. Amazingly, we are now in the same geographic area, shop at the same grocery, travel the same roads, etc. Small world getting smaller. Anyway, after a week of saying hi and swapping messages and funny comments, we started chatting and, surprisingly, it was like the 13 year absence didn't exist. When you are blessed with a good friend, there is a natural ebb and flow. Easy conversations, a shared sense of humor, similarities that go beyond coincidence. I'm so glad we've crossed paths again. The conversations we have had recently made me remember how much fun we've had in our past. I hope that continues. We always need friends, don't we. Even if that friend picked Siena over my beloved Buckeyes in their bracket, then had the nerve to actually be correct in the pick. Painful! And, if you're reading this, I look forward to paying off that bet.

Dave has a big birthday this week! He turns 40 on Thursday, and, unlike me, seems to be handling it with grace and ease. I'm sure I'll cry for a week before mine, but that is a ways off. That's the bonus of marrying someone much, much older! Okay, it's only 5 1/2 years older, but still.

Speaking of birthdays, my blogger friend, Julie, has a birthday tomorrow. Be sure to stop by and wish her a Happy Birthday!!! Julie is one of the funniest people I have ever met. If you aren't familiar with her blog, please take some time to read it. Her take on life is refreshing, humorous, and, at times, poignant, but always spot-on! Happy Birthday, Julie! I hope your birthday is fabulous. And if you can stretch your celebrations into a week, then I will be truly impressed.

My dad's birthday is next Sunday, so I'm sure by the end of this week, I'll have eaten enough cake to fulfill Marie Antoinette's wish that started the French Revolution.

Speaking of cakes (and good segues, thankyouverymuch), I have signed up for a cake decorating class on Wednesday nights in April. My mom used to do this, and I have always thought it would be fun. Fingers crossed that I have the skills.

Hmmmm, what else.

I know a lot of people have been asking about Dave. He has not yet found a job in the Columbus area, but we are hopeful. It's been hard, but we are dealing with it. And we always appreciate the tips. If you hear of something, please let us know. It's obviously a bad market, and we are lucky that we are both securely employed. We have the ability to be patient.

My job is still just fabulous. I really enjoy what I do. I basically have conversations all day long. That is such a perfect job for a big mouth like me. I love to talk! And I do it so well. The clients I talk to are also great. They are friendly, and some of them are hilarious. Not a day goes by that I'm not completely cracking up on at least 2-3 calls during a day. Sometimes I wonder if my bosses are thinking I'm on a personal call. My favorites are the ones who call in and immediately tell me how warm it is in Florida or Georgia or Arizona or wherever it is they are calling from. Although March in Ohio can suck, we've had some mild and, dare I say, beautifully warm and sunny days. Spring fever abounds.

Egyptians > Andy Warhol

2009-03-10T08:04:00.003-04:00

Dear Hyatt on Capital Square,

Thanks!

Your friend for the next advertising cycle,

Kim

P.S. The Egyptian Mummy looks much cooler when it's 6 stories high!

Pssst...

2009-03-07T00:50:00.004-05:00

Hi there! Yes, I'm talking to you, the good people at Edy's. Listen, we all know times are tough. I get that the cost of ingredients is constantly going up. But your new ice cream container, the one that is now one pint less than before? It's pathetic. And you know that, don't you. You're not stupid. And you also know that because I'm addicted to your Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup Ice Cream, I will willingly fork over the money like I'm trading cash for smack in a back alley. Well, no more, my ice cream purveying friends! I'm putting myself in ice cream rehab. I will no longer be a pawn in your game.

Okay, who's next?

Ah yes, I see you hiding over there in the corner, Hyatt on Capital Square. Listen, I'm all for advertising events. But I have been staring at that creepy-ass banner of Andy Warhol for eight weeks now! Eight!! And that event ended February 15th, according to said banner. Every morning, as I travel down 3rd Avenue from 670, that scary-looking man with dead eyes is looking at me, sending chills skittering up and down my spine. That's not a good way to start the day. Now, I know time gets away from us all, but you're a hotel. You have special software that keeps track of dates. Now why is it that you can keep track of what time someone makes a call from their room, yet you can't seem to remember that a banner needs to come down from the side of your building? It's three weeks overdue! Haven't we all suffered enough?!?

This is good...let's keep going.

This is an open statement to all of those people who are pulling ALL of their money out of their banks because they think President Obama is going to take it. He's not, you bunch of reactionary twits. He's also not going to seize money from "Republican Banks," nor will he "turn us all Muslim." Ignorance is not bliss, and all you're doing is lengthening the recovery time for this economic crisis. And if you take your money from the bank, hide it in your home, and it gets stolen, please don't cry on the news about it. NOBODY will feel sorry for you. If you are going to do stupid things, you have to expect really rotten outcomes. That's because you clearly need to learn a lesson, and it needs to be appropriately painful so you get it. Like we don't have enough problems already without this.

And last, but not least, it's time you and I had a little chat, whatever your name is who was just on The Bachelor. I don't watch it, so I'm going off what I read and saw online. Let's forget the fact that you have to be a pretty big narcissist to be on the show in the first place. Putting your three year old son on the show with you is awful. What, exactly, is wrong with you?!? And that whole debacle with the two women? Shameful. And as an aside to the second choice, whatever your name is: If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you. But good luck. It seems pretty apparent that you two deserve each other.

Now can someone get that kid's mom on the phone and tell her to take some control. For crying out loud, he'll be in therapy at age 5 at the rate he's going.

The Big Update

2009-02-27T23:59:00.003-05:00

Yeah, I know, it's been a while and there is so much to get caught up on but...

I just have to say...

this guy's eyebrows scare me to death!!!

Seriously! They are taking over his face!!! I just don't get how someone hasn't taken him aside and said "Dude. Listen. Waxing isn't such a bad thing." I think those brows are behind this whole "Jonas Brothers Take Over The World" plot. Those three metrosexuals are too busy applying hair product to actually be pinpointing their next move.

Yeesh! I can't even look at that photo for too long...it creeps me out. I'm going to have nightmares tonight. Giant eyebrows looming over me.

Chills. Up. My. Spine.

Where was I? Oh right...the update. Here goes...

Job? Awesome! Fabulous!! Love it!!! So happy I work there!!!! Coworkers couldn't be better!!!!! Can't stop typing the exclamation point!!!!!!

No, really, it's great. In fact, I'm having so much fun doing my job that I cannot believe it. Silly me...after my last job, I thought your managers had to make your life a living hell, had to be incredibly paranoid and think everyone was out to get them, had to take the joy and fun out of work, had to berate and belittle their employees until they all eventually leave. Turns out...not so much.

Living apart from Dave still sucks tremendously. In a way, I'm glad. I don't want to get used to being away from him. Fingers crossed that he finds something down there without too much waiting.

Living with Gramma and Mom? Easier than I thought. In fact, it's been great. Dinner is ready and on the table when I get home from work each night. Not bad, huh? And Gramma is a great cook, so that's always nice. Sometimes she even packs my lunch. I'm incredibly spoiled.

Oh, and I just bought two new pairs of shoes. Both slingbacks. Both black. But one pair is peep-toe, so they are totally different. And only a girl will get that last statement.

Here I Am!

2009-02-01T14:57:00.003-05:00

For the past three weekends, as I'm driving north on I-71 to get home to Dave, I run though a ton of ideas for a blog post. But then I get home and they all fly right out of my head. I can never think of something to write about, and I don't really feel like doing it anyway.

These two days I have with Dave are so precious. Even if we're just sitting on the couch watching TV, I don't want to interrupt that. So time ticks by, Saturday becomes Sunday, and the next thing I know, I'm heading south on I-71. Back to Gahanna. The start of a new week. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Time just slips away.

So here I am, determined to type something, so that I don't feel like I've abandoned the blog.

The new job is great. The transition has been easier than I expected. If it weren't for the crappy winter storms we've been getting, I'd be going out more often after work. I have plans for three of the four nights this week, so that's a start, right?

Look, Cleveland, It's Not You. It's Me.

2009-01-10T22:05:00.003-05:00

I know that breakups are hard, but it's really for the best. And trying to keep me here by throwing a foot of snow in my direction just isn't cool. So let's part as friends. We'll remember the good times, but it's better to make a clean break.

Listen, we both knew this was a temporary thing. I know that five years doesn't really seem like "temporary" to you, but you and I both know I would have hightailed it out of here long ago had the conditions been right. You were a waiting room, and now my number's been called.

We did have good times. Do you remember when I met Dave? You helped me meet him, so thanks! How about my first Indians game, when the weather was unseasonably warm in early May? The night was gorgeous, the hot dogs and pretzels were delish, and everyone was in a good mood.

And then you took off the side mirror of the car in some kind of fit.

Okay, maybe a little bit of it was you. Like remember in August of 2003 when we joked about how much fun the power outage at work was? We all got to leave 5 hours early and it was a gorgeous day? We had a picnic in my back yard and lots of people came. That was great. But then two weeks later you decided to take down the entire power system on the northeast grid. That was a little crazy.

Or how about after my first winter here, when I said that I liked snow. I meant that I liked a little bit of snow, in winter, when appropriate. But then you went crazy again and decided to send snow from the beginning of October until the middle of May the next year. You set a record, for crying out loud. 105" of freaking snow in one season, except the "season" included fall, winter and spring! You just don't know restraint.

I need to be in a place that freaks out when 3" of snow falls. I can't be in a place that gets 5-6" and they call it flurries! I'm not all that jazzed about "Lake Effect."

I'm not saying that I won't come back. I will, occasionally. We can still get together to reminisce about the old times. But for now, this is goodbye.

Excuse Me, Mother Nature? Please Stop.

2009-01-10T13:20:00.003-05:00

As some of you know, I leave tomorrow to relocate for my new job which starts Monday. I thought I would head down around noon, but the 12-14" predicted snowfall may pose a bit of a problem. Unbelievable! I let Dave take the Explorer to New York, figuring he would need it more than me. Ummm, negative. They have nothing.

And the worst part is that I have to shovel the sidewalk and driveway. I haven't shoveled in a while due to my asthma and the fact that my husband is a stud. I'm thinking I need to wait for my neighbor to come out with his snow blower and hope that he takes pity on me. That would be nice, huh? As of 3 hours ago, we had received another 5 1/2".

But we're just getting started. And I am off to shovel the drive a bit. I figure I should do a little at a time, instead of trying to shovel all 12 inches at once. Thanks, Mother Nature. It's such a wonderful good-bye present from Cleveland.

Confession...is this thing on?

2009-01-07T01:30:00.003-05:00

Hello, my name is Kim and I just ate my husband's Reese's Peanut Butter Cups that he was saving. The ones I got him as a thank you for standing in line at Kohl's two days after Christmas so I could keep shopping while he crept forward towards the registers. The one that he was so excited to get and wanted to save because it was the huge pack. The King Size one. Yeah, I ate part of it. Not all of it, mind you. But enough. And since he isn't here, he won't know until he gets back.

Unless he reads this blog. Hmmmmmmm.

Does he read this blog? I can't remember the last time he mentioned it.

Hey, chocolate and peanut butter are not to be trifled with in this household! And when you put them together? Well that's just heaven in bite-size form. Even my niece is in on the deliciousness. When I gave it to him, I told him to hide it. Palmer was coming over to open presents and I knew she would find it. David underestimated the allure of Reese's to a 2 1/2 year old. I, however, did not. He put it in the room we were staying in while at my Gramma's.

Anyone want to guess how long it took her to find it? Less than five minutes. And that's just walking in the door. Once she was in our room, it was under a minute. So really, he's lucky to still have it.

Yeah, I'm rationalizing at this point. I could go tomorrow and get another one for him. Put it back in the cupboard. He'd never know.

New Year, New Challenges

2009-01-05T22:34:00.005-05:00

So you may remember in my last post how I so eloquently said goodbye to 2008. It was beautiful and moving, wasn't it? Couldn't you just envision those lovely Von Trapp children waving ever so gently, ever so slowly to the crowd of couture-wearing Austrians at their father's soiree while climbing the stairs at the end of the So Long, Farewell song as you read it.

Okay, I'm snapping back to reality. I was vulgar and not even close to eloquent, but it suited how I was feeling.

Now that the new year is upon us, I am looking forward. I start my new job a week from today, and to say I am nervous is putting it very lightly. It's not just about starting a new job. That's the easy part. It's the fact that I am going to be apart from Dave during the weekdays. And to let you know just how I feel about that, I just started to tear up when I typed that last line. There's a knot in my stomach and a hitch in my breathing.

Dave and I have friends who have five children...five! And when the wife was pregnant with number 5, the husband moved 3 hours away to take a job. The wife had 4 kids at home, was pregnant again, and had to run things without her husband. And search for a job closer to their new home. Now, before someone gets mad and screams at me that there are plenty of capable single mothers who do this every single day blah blah, just stop right there. I get it...I do. My point is that she wasn't a single mom. She was a mom who had to make do without dad because he was laying the groundwork for their family to move up. But she was still responsible for the daily well-being of herself and her kids without her partner.

My point in telling this story is that my situation is much more bearable than hers, so I shouldn't complain. But still. I'm sad that I'll be sleeping alone for 5 of the 7 nights a week. Plus we live in the center of crappy Ohio weather, particularly in the winter (2 words...lake effect!) so thinking I'll be able to come home every weekend is probably folly. Best laid plans, right?

I'm really preoccupied by this too. Dave is in New York right now with his mom who is recuperating from surgery. He called me on my cell today when I was driving back from errands. I was sitting in the car talking to him while getting all my packages together. I couldn't find my phone, though. I sat there frantically searching for my cell phone while it was...wait for it...attached to my right hand, held up to my ear. I think it took me several minutes to figure this out. I'm just scattered.

And that's just perfect for someone who has to pack up her daily life and move it in just a few days. I've already started lists. Plural. I have more than one. There's the clothes list, the bathroom list, the stuff list, the prescriptions list. I think I've already lost that last one, so I'll have to duplicate it. But all the lists in the world won't tell me how to feel okay about being apart from my best friend, my partner, the love of my life, the man I have come to depend on.

When I got married, I was so independent. I had lived alone for a long time, and I liked my alone time. I'm not that person anymore. One night is fine. Two is pushing it. Three nights apart makes me nervous. I need him with me, and that's not a bad thing. It's not that we're co-dependent. It's just that I WANT him with me. I feel like it's us against the world. He's my guy and I'm his girl. His Nick to my Nora.

I don't want to get used to him not being there. But here we are, looking at at least 5-6 months of this. Sigh. I'm so thankful that this door has opened for me, for us. But I pray that another door opens soon, so it can be us again, and not just me.

Screw You, 2008!

2008-12-31T21:04:00.004-05:00

I keep reading all of these blogs that have a 2008 review in them. It's all the rage. Not me, baby!

For me, 2008 sucked. I worked for an awful, crazy, delusional and paranoid boss in a job I hated, left that job to take another job that fell through the cracks, and spent the last 2 1/2 months of the year unemployed. 2008 was the year that Dave's blood pressure went through the roof and his ugly genetically-high cholesterol decided to stop by and stay a while. We had major issues in the fertility department and to top it all off, kidney stones was my birthday gift.

Thanks, 2008. You suck!!!

But 2009? 2009 is already looking better. I have a new job which will start soon, and we'll be relocating to Columbus. Yes, things are looking up.

Happy New Year, everyone!

Hi Mom!

2008-12-15T21:19:00.003-05:00

So, this weekend, I found out my mom reads my blog. I immediately realized that I should go back through my posts and make sure I didn't have anything on here that should be kept from her. I think I'm in the clear, though.

Mom, how come you never comment on my fabulous blog?!? (She hates how often I use the word "fabulous.")

Anyway, welcome to the blog, Mom. I'll see you next week. Love you!

My Little Charlie Brown Christmas Tree

2008-12-08T19:44:00.004-05:00

I have to be honest...the past few years we haven't put up a Christmas tree. Sad, huh? It's just that we don't spend any time at home during the holidays. We spend 7-10 days traveling between our families. I don't wrap gifts until I get to the destination, so nothing gets put under the tree. And we have a small house. We don't really have the room for a full-size tree.

Enter the little pencil tree I rescued from my mom! I bought it 5 years ago for my office. Mom saw it when I moved, and she totally stole it. Okay, maybe "stole" is a harsh word. Maybe I meant to say "borrowed knowing full well she would never return it so I had to stage a rescue."

Anyway, it fits perfectly on a side table in the living room. The only sad thing is that the beautiful angel that I love so much cannot fit onto the top of the tree. So I have it sitting beside the tree instead.

Instead of the angel, I have a little Boyd's Bear Santa on top of the tree instead.

And you know what, I really love the little tree! It's perfect. It makes me happy. And at a time when a lot of things have made me sad this season, it's nice to come home to a warm feeling.

Hate is Such a Strong Word

2008-12-04T15:54:00.004-05:00

You know what I hate? I absolutely hate the sound of water being poured. There is an ad on TV for Brita that kills me with their incessant pouring of water. That sounds just grates on my nerves. It's awful.

I used to work with this guy, Greg, who was hilarious! I loved being around him. He was hilarious, and he always found a way to cut the stress in our office. We worked for this absolute crazy nazi-ish manager and he could make her look so ridiculous that I would laugh myself into an asthma attack. And having to use that inhaler that made me shake like an addict was totally worth it. But he was constantly pouring himself huge glasses of water out of a pitcher he kept out of his desk.

And he knew it drove me crazy, so he did it even more. Oh, that sound! It haunts me. And when that commercial comes on, I can't mute the TV quick enough.

Thanksgiving Can Last For a Week, Right?

2008-12-02T23:36:00.005-05:00

Dave and I braved the horror that is I-71 from Cleveland to Columbus last Wednesday in order to spend Thanksgiving with my family. Can someone explain to me why the construction powers-that-be decided the day before a major travel holiday would be good to shut down 2 of 3 lanes for absolutely no reason? I wanted to find out where those jerks were eating their turkey on Thursday and then drive really s-l-o-w-l-y in front of them, delaying their arrival by 2-3 hours just to get even. Morons!

I figured we would stay through the weekend in order to help Gramma put up the tree and decorate, but I extended my stay a few days in order to bake Christmas cookies. We freeze them so they are wonderful on Christmas Day...otherwise, yuck! Too early. We also made buckeyes. The last time I made these was for my wedding 2 1/2 years ago, and we made over 400. This time we made a single batch and they were done so quickly. How I ever convinced my mother and gramma to help me with that project, I'll never know. And somehow I managed to escape putting them in the wrappers and boxing them up, not to mention assembling the boxes, and closing and sealing them. Thank God for my matron of honor. [Side note to BJ...you are the best and I didn't deserve the amount of work you put into that weekend!]

So now I'm getting home a week later and playing catch up with emails, phone messages and laundry. Anytime you get one-on-one time with Gramma, it's good. And yummy food! 7 days of yummy goodness. Thankfully her pantry is in the basement and I had to keep running up and down the steps.

So, what did I miss?

Worst Movie Ever? Quite Possibly.

2008-11-19T15:24:00.003-05:00

I somehow got tricked into watching the movie The Bodyguard this weekend by Dave, which surprised me, seeing as it really should be classified as a chick-flick and he is SO not into those! Anyway, I had made it all this time without ever watching it. I mean, come on, there's a reason for that. Subconsciously, I knew it was a lot of crap rolled into a 2-hour delivery. But I wasn't fully prepared for just how bad it actually was.

I think the premise of Whitney Houston (the worst actress ever, or pretty darn close) playing a character who was receiving an Oscar for Best Actress was so unbelievably ridiculous that the movie was ruined right there. Shouldn't the director have realized this and changed the script accordingly? Make her a singer receiving a Grammy...I'll buy it. The horrendous acting wouldn't have been so obvious. It's like trying to shoot a film about Paris in Tijuana. By the end of the movie...no, wait, that's a lie...by the middle of the movie, I wanted the bad guy to kill her and end the suffering for all of us.

And really, can you now watch anything with Whitney in it without hearing her yell "Bob-bay!!!!!!" I surely can't.

The Bodyguard...two hours of the worst crap you'll ever witness on film.

I'm In Love!!!

2008-11-17T18:56:00.003-05:00

Okay, it's a blog I'm in love with...but it got your attention, right? I have recently discovered Smitten Kitchen. I was searching for a fried chicken recipe this weekend and stumbled across this fabulous site! And I do mean fabulous. It's like porn for foodies. The author was featured on Martha Stewart's show on blogs in mid-September. She blogs 2-3 times a week with great recipes and ideas. Even if you don't cook, the photos are sumptuous. Reading the blog has awakened the foodie in me that apparently fell asleep a few months ago.

Crickets Chirping

2008-11-14T22:56:00.004-05:00

So I know I've been quiet for a while now, but I guess I don't have anything I need to say. I've kept myself busy, even though I'm not working right now. But not so busy that I can't keep up with the blog. It's amazing how important stupid things become when you no longer have truly important things happening. Today, I ran out of butter. And then I forgot to call Dave and have him get some on the way home. When he got home and I realized what I hadn't done, I acted like it was the end of the world. Drama over freaking butter!

I hate not working. I feel sluggish and dull. I feel unimportant and lazy. Most importantly, I feel like I'm not contributing, and that totally sucks. I'm praying that a door will open for me and I can find a job that will be fulfilling. Because I honestly cannot stand this inactivity!

Freaking Awesome Weather!!!

2008-11-05T17:04:00.004-05:00

I love unseasonably warm days. And today was so fabulous! I spent the day with Dave at the golf course. I even pitched in and took the ball-picker out to clear the driving range. I love it when the guys on the range aim at me. Most of them can't hit the broad side of a barn, so just imagine them aiming for a MOVING target!

I know cold weather is coming, but I am just enjoying this for now. It reminds me of a Christmas Eve some years back...I think I was in junior high...and it was 70 degrees. We drove to my grandparents' house with the windows down. It reminds to just get out and enjoy the day because who knows what tomorrow will bring.

I'm off to enjoy the sunset.

I'm Not Ready

2008-10-27T20:16:00.003-04:00

I'm not ready. I'm not ready for cold weather or snow or ice or frozen tundra-like landscapes. And I'm especially not ready for LAKE-EFFECT!!!

I'm freaking out here.

Virtual Vacation Day 3-Denmark, the Happiest Place on Earth

2008-10-25T20:50:00.005-04:00

In honor of the Dane who visited my blog Friday, Day 3 of my Virtual Vacation is being spent in Denmark. I've read that it's the happiest place on earth. Don't take my word for it, though. Here's a video:

A few quick facts:
*Home of Hans Christian Andersen
*One of the oldest kingdoms dating back to Gorm the Old (910-958)
*Second-most visited country in Scandinavia
*Constitutional monarchy with parliamentary system of government
*Current Queen is Margrethe II
*Associated with being the home of the Vikings
*Population of 5.4 million
*Home to Lars Ulrich (Metallica drummer), Connie Nielsen (actress), and Helena Christensen (model).

My First European Blog Visitor

2008-10-25T10:44:00.004-04:00

I was reading my blog stats this morning, and I had my first blog visit from Europe. Someone in Denmark found my blog via a search on Albufeira and was directed to my Virtual Vacation post.

Hooray! I hear that Denmark has fabulous sandwiches called smorrebrod which are as varied and wonderful as can be. And their Crown Prince is quite the action man. And he married an Australian whose haircolor I covet.

In honor of this, I will be visiting Denmark tomorrow on my Virtual Vacation.

Death by Golf Club

2008-10-25T10:06:00.003-04:00

So my husband, whom I normally love and adore, wanted me to come in to work with him today. He told me he had to be here early, because he had lessons and clinics. So I got up at 6am on a rainy, cold, dismal Saturday so we could be in by 7:30am.

Do you know what time he actually had to be here? 10AM!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was ready to KILL him when I found that out. I was so tired, and it was so warm and cozy in my bed and it was so dark outside. I could hear the rain and I did not want to move. But no, Mr. I Have To Be 2 Hours Early forced me up and out the door.

Obviously the only solution is death by golf club. Should I go with a driver or an iron?

Virtual Vacation-Day 2...Let's Scuba!!

2008-10-25T00:08:00.004-04:00

Welcome to Day 2 of my Virtual Vacation. Today I'm scuba-diving at the Great Barrier Reef. The best part? No jet lag!!

I Declare a Virtual Vacation

2008-10-24T00:52:00.004-04:00

Since I'm home anyway, I've decided to take a virtual vacation. For every day that I'm not working, I'm going to visit a new place. Today I'm visiting the Algarve in Portugal. I spent some time there ten years ago, and I loved the people, the towns, the ocean, the beaches! This is a video I stole from someone else. It's my favorite beach, in a town called Albufeira. In order to get to this beach, you have to climb down a steep set of steps. Albufeira is a version of an Arabic word meaning lagoon, which is perfect for this cove. I would love to go back!

Catching Up

2008-10-23T10:33:00.007-04:00

I realized that I still have a ton of pictures on my camera, and thought I would share some of them. Some of you remember the apple-picking trip from September. Here are some photos of my niece, Palmer, and my mom from that trip...

Of course, no trip to the orchard is complete without lunch and ice cream at Ye Olde Mill followed by a walk by the water wheel and the duck pond. Big Day!

And here's a video from the day!

Curse you, Down Comforter!

2008-10-23T00:17:00.003-04:00

I finally did it! I broke down and got the winter bedding out. I washed my jersey sheets and thermal blankets, rinsed them in the fabulous lavender-scented Downy and now have a bed that is ready for cold and crappy weather. I think it's the thing that depresses me most about the coming season.

That being said, I do love my winter bed! It's so cozy and inviting with it's fluffy down comforter and incredibly soft sheets. It begs you to hunker down and stay a while. Last March, when that awful blizzard came through, I spent most of that snowy Saturday in it, catching up on several months worth of magazines. It also makes it hard to get out of it on those super-cold mornings.

I hate winter. Why don't we just hibernate?

Bad Hair in the Wind

2008-10-21T11:17:00.002-04:00

I was flipping through the channels today, trying desperately to find something to watch that was work-friendly (I'm tagging along with Dave to work today) and found unintentional comedy on VH1. Did you know they show videos from the 70's?!?

First of all, let me just say that the amount of hair that men sported back then was, quite frankly, appalling! Was it really that attractive to women back then to date men who had hair longer than theirs? And the beards? Really? You needed emergency nesting material for whatever wayward bird flew your way?

The first video we saw was "Dust in the Wind" by Kansas. Folks, I've been in Kansas. They know about dust. Anyway, in the interest of full disclosure, I should also tell you it was the only video we saw. I was laughing too hard, so we changed the channel. Dave's first comment was "Jesus?" And I could totally see where he was coming from, as two of the band members did resemble him, except these guys clearly just came from their prom or a really awful wedding with the tuxes they were sporting.

And talk about a depressing song! I don't feel right just telling you about it. I want to share it as well! So here, good readers, is the video in question:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hkbdP7sq0w8

I'm off to find more videos from that era. I need the laughs today.

I'm Tired of Politics

2008-10-12T23:31:00.003-04:00

Anyone else? I'm so ready for the election to be over. OVER. O-V-E-R!!! Every other commerical is political. The level of vitriol being spewed at rallies is atrocious. And what exactly is it about elections that brings out the most ignorant, nasty people? It's getting to the point that watching the news is just depressing. There's a reason I don't know what to wear to work every day. I'm afraid to get the weather report, for fear of getting sucked in to 20 minutes of political crap.

3 more weeks.

I can get through that, right?!?

A Blog for my Best Friend

2008-10-07T15:35:00.002-04:00

We all have at least one, right? A best friend. A person who has seen you at your very best, your very worst, and everything in between. Someone who takes the time to drop everything and chat with you about nothing, just because. For me, that's BJ. She's my very best friend. We've known each other since our freshman year of high school. We've been through it all together: dating, marriage, her pregnancy and childbirth, my constant job changes, everything!

Some people are blessed to live close enough to see their best friend on a regular basis. BJ and I are not that lucky. She lives in western Kentucky. I live in northeast Ohio. Before she moved there, she lived in Texas. We burn the phone lines, though. And when the opportunity arises, we are able to see each other. This weekend was one of those times. BJ, her husband and baby were up for the Quarter Horse Congress in Columbus, so I took an extra day off and had a long weekend with them. I got some cuddle time with their daughter, too, which is always a bonus!

Here is BJ doing what she does...I wish I knew more about it, but I just don't. But I am in awe at the wonderful life and career she has built for herself. Through thick and thin, she always sees the positive. She is a joy to me.

So this entry is dedicated to my very best friend, BJ, who reminds me to always look on the bright side, to live my life honestly, to love my husband with all my heart, and to embrace whatever comes my way.

BJ, I loved having three days to hang out with you. They were priceless. I cannot imagine my life without you as my sounding board, my cheerleader, my most sincere critic, and my calm before, during and after the storm.

I'm a Pet Owner...okay, not really

2008-10-01T22:03:00.002-04:00

I adopted a virtual pet, because my schedule combined with allergies does not allow me to have a real pet besides fish. And who wants to deal with that? (No offense to "fish people")

So over there to the right, under that fabulous picture of my awesome husband on our honeymoon, you will find Pilar the Pig. She's kinda cute, and seems to be really enamored with her tail. If I do okay with her, I might find a friend for her. Maybe a turtle or a hedgehog. I love stuffed and cartoon pigs. I also like them roasted or fried, but don't tell Pilar. There is the cutest stuffed pink pig at Cracker Barrel. Someday, she will be mine.

When I was four, I was a flower girl in a wedding in Dayton. I lost my stuffed pig in the hotel. I just know that damn housekeeper gathered her up in the sheets and that was that. I was DEVASTATED. I cried all the way back to Columbus, then for two more nights. I wanted my pig!!!

And clearly I am still affected. And I still hate Dayton for it. Sorry, Daytonites, it's nothing personal...except if you were the housekeeper in question, and then it's entirely personal!

I've Been Tagged!

2008-09-29T21:00:00.003-04:00

Hooray!!! This is the first time this has happened to me. Allison tagged me to give seven random facts about me. So please stay to read my facts, then run over to Allison's blog and find out her random facts. One word...TBDBITL. Wait, is that a word?

Random Fact 1. I was a Girl Scout for 1st through 12th grade. I won the Gold Award, and worked two years at summer camp as a counselor.

Random Fact 2. I have a fledgling pastry and cookie business.

Random Fact 3. I love, love, love chocolate peanut butter ice cream.

Random Fact 4. I am addicted to Spearmint Tic Tacs and they are nearly impossible to find in stores. I'm seriously considering buying them in bulk online.

Random Fact 5. I really enjoy reading cookbooks.

Random Fact 6. I have a mixed marriage...my husband is a Republican and I am a Democrat. Sometimes I get so angry at his views that I want to throw something at him.

Random Fact 7. I worry incessantly about everything.

So, there you go! 7 random facts.

A Bushel and a Peck

2008-09-25T22:33:00.000-04:00

It's apple-picking time! Oh, how I loooooove picking apples!! This weekend my mom and I will take our annual trip to Legend Hills Orchard in Utica. This year is really special, because it is the first time we are taking my niece, Palmer, who is 2. We've taken my other nieces and nephew from the time they were her age. It's a really great day.

After picking, we always go to Ye Olde Mill for lunch and ice cream. Ye Olde Mill is the home of Velvet Ice Cream, which is really good. You've had it if you've ever eaten a dessert with ice cream at Bob Evans restaurants.

The best part of the day is the smell of the car on the way home. Yummy!!!

And for those of you who are curious, a peck is equal to 8 quarts or 16 pints. 4 pecks equal 1 bushel. And that is your lesson for the day.

Happy Apple Picking!!!

Wishin' and hopin’ and thinkin’ and prayin’

2008-09-12T23:30:00.000-04:00

For two years now, David and I have been actively trying to get pregnant. I knew we would have trouble, because I was diagnosed with PCOS four years ago. I knew the issues and the odds, and that we would need help. But honestly, I really thought that once we started down the road of fertility treatments, we would have success.

I was wrong.

While we are really just at the beginning of treatments available to us, I know that as we cross a method off the list, the odds of us conceiving become lower. It's so incredibly frustrating. I see people bounce into each other sideways who end up pregnant. I see people who probably, for all intents and purposes, should not have children, yet they have no issues in that department whatsoever.

I think the hardest thing is watching cases of abused children...children that were born into such horrific circumstances that you just know the chances of them growing up unscathed are slim. What I wouldn't give to hold and cuddle and cherish a child, and there are people out there that throw them away like trash. It just hurts so much.

I haven't written about our struggles with this before, and I'm not sure I will going forward. But I needed to put this down, because things aren't going well, and it is very hard emotionally. I see little ones and I yearn to be a mother. And while I would never begrudge someone's wonderful news, I must admit that sometimes the pain and frustration is overwhelming when someone announces a pregnancy. I don't want to be the person that lists our issues as a kind of scorecard, because that just highlights my failures.

But I do want to ask for your prayers and/or good thoughts.

Great American Pastime..or Losing 4 Hours to Really Bad Baseball

2008-08-17T19:14:00.000-04:00

Dave and I attended an Indians game today. I got tickets through work, and even though I spent the afternoon with the very people I try to stay away from on my days off, we did have a good time.

Here is our view... you don't get the "nosebleed high" feeling from the photo, but we were pretty far up there. How far, you ask? Well, we could see the passengers in the jets circling the field before landing at Hopkins Airport easier than we could make out the ball players. So high that the ball would travel past the pitcher's mound before we heard the "crack" of the bat.

Jacobs Field was renamed this year to Progressive Field, but make no mistake, I will always call it Jacobs Field or The Jake. I'd love to say it's because I'm protesting the corporate takeover of our daily lives, but really, it's just because it's been The Jake for something like 14 years. I simply cannot remember the new name. And there's no quick, cute nickname to call it.

Quick question...have ballpark hotdogs ALWAYS tasted like a salt lick? Yikes...one bite and my ankles instantly swelled.

Anyway...we won the game, but it was an endurance trial to sit there through so many innings of bad ball. Some of these guys are getting paid millions of dollars to let a ball roll through their glove...I'm looking at you, Grady Sizemore. T-Ball was more appealing than today's game. Thank goodness I had the distraction of jets flying by my left ear.

Not Exactly the Stones I Wanted for My Birthday

2008-08-05T21:06:00.000-04:00

Months ago, I told Dave I wanted a birthstone ring for my birthday. A pretty peridot ring. That's all! Imagine my surprise when my "birthday present" came early...Sunday night to be exact, in the form of Kidney stones. Yikes, is this painful. This birthday has turned out to be pretty sucky. Worse than the year I turned 14 and my ear canals swelled shut from a massive ear infection.

Apparently bad birthdays happen every 20 years for me. And no, I didn't get the peridot ring. I did, however, get Vicodin and rainbow sherbet. Now if that isn't a combo, I don't know what is!!

Happy Birthday to ME!!!!!!!!

Also sharing this day with me?

Fellow Ohioan Neil Armstrong, Maureen McCormick (Marcia, Marcia, MARCIA!), Loni Anderson, and Patrick Ewing.

So, no cake or celebrations today...but this weekend I'm reclaiming my day!